Well Mrs Fogg managed a total of 3 bottles of champoo last night and half a bottle of Baileys as we watched the moon on the Caribbean Ocean into the wee small hours finishing her 40th Birthday celebration.

Today saw us with a leisurely get up (around 7am), breaky and then to the pool for a few hours before lunch in our reserved open air hut.

This afternoon we went and did a Segway Tour of Mount Pimard on the oh so super and rugged X2, going all off road with our cool guide Shaka. Lunch was supplied as a variety of picked fruits prepared by Shaka and Coconut water to wash it down. 2 hours of fun finishing off by racing across the beach at Rodney Bay doing 14mph. Absolutely brilliant. We also went to feed Koi Carp with bread and the Koi attacked the bread like piranha, that was amazing to watch.

Tonight is the Managers cocktail party with a load of new arrivals so that should be as interesting as watching milk curdle. Last time we were here they had hired a new Restaurant Manager who was painfully shy and seemed to do nothing but stand and stare blankly so we nicknamed him Tattoo out of Fantasy Island. The same guy is still around and none of his charm or confidence has increased. He still stands and stares blankly although he does appear to have been demoted to waiting tables

Segway Tour of St.Lucia

Oh my! I’ve finally hit the big 40 and what a day! Having hijacked Mr Fogg’s phone ( mine has stayed firmly switched off, I’m on holiday dontcha know!) I can share my day with you.

Late rise, fab breaky as normal in our island paradise followed by a return to the room and BEAUTIFUL exotic flowers!

Next a nice chill by the pool followed by lovelly lunch and access to a chocolate fountain and yummy marshmallows.

Then Mr Fogg tricked me into getting showered ( yummy BIG showers here…) and going to sit on the beach to watch the sunset. We ambles down to the beach ONLY to have a huge speedboat waiting for our very own private party! One bottle of champagne later and several glasses of Rose and we were sailing the waves in a 12 seated speedboat just for us and our skipper Delroy. What can I say? Wonderful, romantic, spectacular, fast, smooth, just wonderful. Mr Fogg has done it again! Bliss.

If life truly begins at 40, it’s got a lot to live up to so far…..

After waking too early for the sky ride we eventually got picked up, last on the list after 2 American couples, one very quiet and the other in their late forties chewing gum the entire bus ride.

Now we love America, but like many cultures they have some interesting quirks, one of which is the inability to filter out their every thought before it hits their mouths. So what you tend to get is a constant inane stream of every single thought regardless and then some. We were treated to every little thought that this couple had for the 1 hour ride to and from the Sky Ride and then the hour long ride itself, wow. Oh and the ride was crap, basically you get in a cable car, go up and over the Forrest and get told a few things about the trees (from a girl wid poowa engl ish), then come back down and no it’s not just me, even Mrs Fogg thought it was naff.

Back in time for lunch, seated outside in a hut listening to a steel band, we were then treated to a display from a pouting family who always sit in that spot and it’s their last Saturday here and it’s their daughters birthday tomorrow, so move. Mrs Fogg was quite polite and restrained, but pouty people were adamant they get their favourite lunch spot or we’ll stomp our feet and scweem and scweem until we make ourselves sick. In the Caribbean life I too short and hot to argue. Nowt queer as folk.

The second to last day of her 30s sees Mrs Fogg acting as a gourmet meal to the local mosquito population. Despite bathing in Deet, the little buggers still managed to make a melon out of her knee, ankle and calf. I can tell you it’s like a scene from a horror movie.

Today we arose at 8am to attend the Yogi for 8.30, only to find they have changed the time to start at 8am, ho hum early breakfast here we come afterall every cloud has a silver lining. We took a slow meander into Castries for a few hours in the high 80s with sweat pouring from every pore, finding any shop with aircon for a welcome respite.

Back just in time for a nice lunch by the sea before a few hours slobbing by the pool and a welcome dip.

Phew this life is just sooo tiring.

Let’s enjoy the people watching again this evening, there is “stick” a girl who resembles Zola Bud on a diet, “hick” who must have drunk every item in the place, can’t stand up straight or still and slurs all the time, “lushes” an Irish couple who bragged about being hammered before the Managers Coctail evening even commenced, “Wife & Slave” where the hubby seems to be wearing a collar, how bizarre and then there’s “Timothy and his mum”, an early thirties guy on holiday with his mummy.

I feel positively normal in comparison (I know I’m not, but hey I can dream).

Day 2 in paradise, and only 3 full days of 39 left for Mrs Foggy. Last night was entertaining after a full days soaking which was quite refreshing, the roof gave way and soaked one poor lady, so they were moved to another table and the waiter proceeded to chuck her drink all over (accidentally of course). on a different table one girl became I’ll, stood up and kept wobbling and we had the old dear who had been left on her own for the evening by hubby, wanting to join in our scrabble game but she was too drunk to even see straight.

And today Mrs Foggy and I got up at 7.15 to go do an hours Yogi in 80 degree sunshine, fools or what. So now fed and watered it’s a day of leisure by the pool and only 2 hours until a BBQ lunch, oh yummy.