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The Great British Ripoff

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Yup a rant this way is a coming Mrs Fogg!

A nice leisurely rise this am, where shall we grab a bite to eat says I, let’s try Burnby Hall Gardens offers Mrs Fogg. Now let me check, does it have food, yes, do you have to pay to get in and buy some food, well this is England isn’t it!

I find it rather annoying that you have to pay £5 each for the right to buy a coffee, but consider you can look at all the wonderful flowers, but I don’t want to look at flowers, all I wanted was a coffee, which all told comes to £6.50 with entrance fee.

Welcome to rip off Britain. Next time I choose.

Mindfulness

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I started a new Yoga class last night. It’s only a local class with three other attendees and the tutor, so it’s very friendly. I’m by far the youngest attendee.

The new class is a bit more sedate than what I was used to previously but it’s great. A wonderful way to relax, stretch and unwind. Last night the lady who takes the class was speaking about the concept of Yoga. It is very much a way of meditating, using the breath to concentrate and forget for a time the distractions of life.

She made an interesting observation. In our busy lives, not everyone can take a class for an hour or two, and few of us take time for ourselves but we can all achieve some space. A simple five minutes to sip and enjoy a cup of tea, a few minutes in bed stretching gently and just focusing on breathing before the day routine starts. These are ways to take time to be mindful of our own bodies, our breath, our lives.

As much as I rush around working and never seem to stop, and as poor as I am at actually taking time at home to do some Yoga, she reminded me last night that is is vital to at least take that five minutes to appreciate my body, my mind and life. After all, just being able to do something as simple as stretch our arms out horizontally today may not be such an easy task at 90, the body is pretty amazing really.

Ok chanty hippy stuff over. Now, about that cup of tea

[Posted from Mrs Foggs super cool iphone]

The Hunger Games

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We have probably the largest garden to date ( apart from Tyddyn where we pretty much had access to the whole valley) and my bird feeder is proving popular. So far we have had Blue Tits, Great Tits, Long Tailed Tits, Chaffinches, Willow Warblers, Finches, Great Spotted Woodpecker, Robins, Blackbirds, Song Thrush, Coal Tit and Wood Pidgeons.

We also have an abundant squirrel population. It’s a good job we have the squirrel dome up though. When we first arrived I placed a coconut feeder in the tree for the birds. Within a day the squirrels had stolen it and Mr Fogg came back from work to see a squirrel trying to drag said coconut across the garden.

So far we have thick squirrels. One has just spent ten minutes running up and down the bird feeder and bashing its head each time on the dome. Now he’s opted to hijack the birds, just clobbered one on the head to pinch the seeds….I’ll make a drink and watch the show me thinks.

[Posted from Mrs Foggs super cool iphone]

Relaxing Bank Holiday….yeah right

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This weekend is the Bridlington Elvis Weekender. The Caddies and us were due to spend the weekend chilling and being very large children larking around at the seaside. unfortunately Mrs Caddie is a little under the weather at the moment so we’ve had to give the larking a miss- well we cannot very well go be silly Elvis fans without our partners in crime can we (yes we know Evis left the building some time ago)??

So what to do with a spare weekend??? Well, we decided it was a great idea to order wall to wall wardrobes from Ikea and set them up in the guest bedroom. they duly arrived on Saturday morning, all 29 boxes of the stuff. Oh dear.

Cue Mr Fogg and I spending around 12 hours hard labour fitting Ikea bolt together packs in place. Wardrobe carcasses times 4, goodness knows how many screws and oh what a good idea two big sliding doors are, complete with 64 screws just to put the doors together with. We’ve finally finished….phew. Two very very very shattered Foggies.

Hey, we have grass now too. We did our first cut and it looks good, despite all the bare bits. So off I went to retrieve the bag of grass seed from the garage to sow in the bald bits. This was a bit like being back in Tyddyn- we have mice. In the garage, they are partial to chomping through grass seed, eating bird seed (after munching through plastic bags to get to it) and the blighters have even eaten through my bags of compost.

We have declared war. Two mouse traps in place, we are on to you……let’s just hope they do not find the house.

We sowed the remaining grass seed on the lawn, feeding the rather large wood pigeon population as we went (buggas), dodging squirrels charging around and watching Mr Spike limping in the house.

You see Mr Spike is enjoying his new home but not the neighbourhood. This is farm cat territory, and there are two big bruiser Toms who have declared our garden the war zone. Cue two lost collars, and one beaten up cat. Poor. Spike, last week he tries his best and did a proper running leap onto Tom1, rolling over and fur flying, but still he’s the underdog. We get to nurse his wounds and cheer him up. Cue wardrobe building….Spike laid supervising (or was that laughing) at our antics.

I’m not moving again, and if we did we have both decided to burn those Bloomin wardrobes where they are- we are not, we repeat, not, dismantling them and rebuilding. Life is just too short for that.

And now for that long awaited glass of wine each. Bedtime yet anyone?

[Posted from Mrs Foggs super cool iphone]

CoitusHedgeHogTerruptus

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Nice herly night for us, nothing on the telly, oh what to do :-p

Or so we thought until the garage spotlight came on, was it a rogue, a wierdy sniffing around, nope a lowly little hedgehog looking for all the leaves to hide in, after Mrs Fogg has cleared them all.

Oh well.

Restaurants

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So here I am again sat on my lonesome in a hotel restaurant sans kiddy party this time. In walks a pair of coffin dodging colonial cousins fresh from a day walking around “Nailsworth” (which has one ATM, one shop and one hotel). Bob and Betty sit down trying to decipher the menu and call over the waitress, “Hi there Missy, so this menu has two options, 2 courses for 12 of your British Pounds and 3 courses for 14 of your British Pounds”, “That’s right sir”, “So answer me this missy, does that mean on the 3 course I can have any 3 courses”, “yes sir”, “but does that mean I can have 3 of your mains”, “err no sir it means you can have any starter, any main and any dessert from the list”, “but I want 3 of your mains for that deal”, “are you serious sir”, “most definitely”, “well I’m sorry that is not how it works”, “well this is what I want so how are you going to help me”, “err, I can’t sir”, “well get someone who can”.

This exchange went on again with the manager to the same end, a standoff, one wanting 3 mains and the other refusing to do that for the meal deal. Eventually the ole farts got up and left, shame there were no other restaurants in the area. But hey it brightened up an otherwise dull evening.

Right Time Wrong Plaice

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After a tough week we decided to chill out and go to the local arty house pictures to watch a little Denzel. Let’s start with a simple meal of Fish and Chips. Now the clue here is its Fish, yet every person coming in was asked “are you wantin fish”, err what else would we want, followed by the spotty yoof shouting to the err “Chef” 2 fish for the fella, 3 fish for this woman, and on and on. We were amused watching this exchange, yet no-one was getting food. Eventually the yoof was replaced after Mr Chef had a stack of fish and customers, dawp! (Oh my Cod, sorry).

Any way only just fed in time to go see the movie (Duty Manager in full flow, not sure how the coffee machine works, or where any programmes were). All told a good film but the best bit was the VW advert at the start, I will never be able to watch Toy Story again. Want to know why? go onto that there pootoob and look for “VW advert about toy story”. And this in a pg15, oh my.

My Journey Starts Here

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Just like Dante my journey started and I entered the gate of hell and did not like it, to explain…..

I have to spend some time in a little place near an even smaller place near Gloucester for the company I happen to be spending some time with (illusive enough for you) and I stop at the same hotel, wier, water wheel, ducks, yada yada, in the same room (the bridal suite, not sure about that one) and eat in the same empty restaurant, apart from this week. If the horned one had sprogs they would not have been called Damien, but Otto and Milo with Ya Ya Mummy. Ya Ya Mummy brought said seed of the Fireman for a family meal (Uncle Fester, Mortitia, Gomez, Wednesday and Pugsley), but could not be Arr Sed looking after the Demon brats who persisted in playing Hide and Scream ever so bloody loudly miles from the Family de Scum. Tis not enough that you have had a long tiring day and the restaurant can only cope with 3 people at a time, to add these horrible little ankle biters into the mix. Now I ain’t a lover of kids (not only did I miss that boat, but I dont think I was even interested where the dock was) and yes I used to be one, but I was never sent to play in the other side of the restaurant so that I didn’t annoy my family. The restaurant dare not ask Ya Ya Mummy to control their kids for fear of upsetting them, so I did the only thing a responsible adult could do (yeh I know, too big words and one sentence), I stuck my foot out so that Otto ate laminate, that stopped the screaming, but did start the bawling, doh!

Skanky granny came a wobbling through to see what had happened to poor lil Otto and proceeded to pull his pants down in full view of all the other people trying to eat to check his knees, even though the demon child was holding his head (alternate medicine methods back in granny’s day). Still she eventually saw sense, or me snarling at her like a rabid dog and dragged Otto off for a nice bit of a chocolate sugar rush.

Gate passed, onto the first circle!