Well decision made, it was time for my Fatboy to be retired after 9 years of service and 5,000 miles. The “fattie” star of many a movie including Terminator 2, is very distinctive, sounds awesome and turns heads, with one problem, if a gnat farts in Outer Mongolia because of the trademark solid wheels, you get blown over. I have actually been forced off the motorway 3 times (lots of gnat farts and who says cows produce a lot of methane). So deal done garage came to collect my beast, but it wasn’t going without a fight.

10 minutes before the van arrived, I went to remove the D-Lock from the wheel, only to find the pin had failed inside the lock. Cue Dr. Google, “tap it with a hammer”, nuffin! So time to call a locksmith, he’ll know what to do. You see apparently you can only pick a lock if the pins are working, so plan b, bolt cutters, nope they shattered, plan c then how about a grinder, HELL NO, think of the spatter and damage. So the locksmith duly set about plan d, trying to drill it apart and after 4 hours of blood, sweat and tears (quite literally as he sliced his hand open twice), the lock gave out (oh and after burning out 10 Tungsten Carbide Drill Bits and 4 normal drill bits).

Bye bye my little fattie, I will miss ya.