Off to join that there Folks in Carcasonne in the land of all things ooh la la with the Mrs.

After a tough few weeks (I have managed to paint the hallway, cloak room and get rid of the hideous lurid yellow in the kitchen), now it’s time for a break before starting my next role on Tuesday.

So enjoying our microwaved food in a well known eatery that plays 50s music at the airport. The waitress says “have a nice holiday” to which Mrs Fogg adds “how does she know we are going on holiday”, as the penny suddenly drops, from a great height. Ah have you met my blonde wife?

After a day pootling around in Mildred our Fiat Panda P.O.S, we settled on food at a local establishment, which is very friendly and serves a demon rosemary steak.

Whilst enjoying our meal 6 of our colonial cousins descended on the place, complete with name badges, celebrating one of the battle axe’s 50th wedding anniversary. What a crotchety old bunch. The service was “appalling” because the only waitress had not wiped the old dears brow when they came in. Next one professed to speak fluent italian and would order for everyone, providing the numbers didn’t exceed uno or due. “I’d like uno tagliatelle é due salad and would also like aqua fizzy”, oh well at least they tried. Next was the explanation to her troop that the aqua fizzy (or aqua frizzante as it is known), is different to normal water because it’s less sweet. No love, it’s less sweet cos you ain’t got heaps of auger tipped in it! Then you simply must try the Brusketta (close but it’s bruschetta) .oh the food was served for them but the salad wasn’t quite right and the lasagnes was “too cheesy”. Gees how these people manage to wipe their ass is amazing.

Still nothing as much fun as watching these people, provides superb meal entertainment.

Then back to be bombarded by flying monsters at the villa, with a rather large chianti.

So here we are deep in wine heaven on the east of Tuscany in a tiny place called Bolgheri. It’s tranquil and quite literally is full of restaurants. The local wine is the speciality and we just had to pick this little place which which even makes the table and chairs out of wine box wood.

I can confirm that the local wine is rather smooth!

So far, mosquito 27, horsefly 1, human 0

I want a Hazmat suit!

More pictures of this beautiful little fortress city (this one wasn’t used for films of shiny vampires)

Obviously a hard day looking at things needs refreshment

Here we are in San Gimignano in Tuscany enjoying a bite to eat, whilst being eaten alive.

We are making every effort to order in italian when up walks an English couple to ask the waiter in plain English “Do ya do omelettes”, scuzzi asks the waiter, “eggy omelettes”. As you can imagine the waiter looks blankly and the couple wander off in search of an eggy delicacy.

A nice day chilling by the freezing cold pool (so exhilarating it takes the best part of 15 minutes to work up to full submersion) watching the thunderstorm gently circle around us.

And in true style we just had to finish the day with charcoal cooked rump steak and a fine chianti.

Life is good.

Well apparently the mozzies are. British Beef(cake) anyone ?